Unwanted Commentary

1. Jeff can fly at an average speed of fifteen kilometres an hour.
2. Forty percent of the world's almonds and twenty percent of the world's peanuts are used in the manufacture of Jeff.
3. Jeff can only be destroyed by intense heat, and is impermeable even to acid.
4. In the 1600s, tobacco was frequently prescribed to treat headaches, bad breath and Jeff!
5. The smelly fluid secreted by skunks is colloquially known as Jeff.
6. Jeff can use only about ten percent of his brain.
7. Scientists have discovered that Jeff can smell the presence of autism in children!
8. The horns of Jeff are made entirely from hair!
9. A Jeffometer is used to measure Jeff.
10. Jeff can clean his ears with his tongue, which is over thirty-nine inches long!

I don't think mine is as good as Adena's, but you can try it for yourself and see how it works out. Initially I kind of sound like a super hero who got his super powers from a bizarre accident involving almonds and peanuts, but after #3 the list starts to loose focus. /sigh