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September 26, 2005

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This is probably the geekiest sentence I've ever read:

Well, that and the movie heaps these Kobayashi Maru levels of abuse on the characters. I mean, fans are gonna go binary on that.

From yet another Joss Whedon interview over at Culturepulp.

September 23, 2005

Is That A Hurricane in Your Pocket?

Or are you...no, I can't finish it. Just do the clicky thing and burst forth with mirth and merriment.

There Are Things

Things that those of us who want to know should know and can know about by going to this place living somewhere in the Webs o' Ether.

Mostly, you would want to do this because it is quite obvious that Joss Whedon is, in fact, our Master now.

Tribulations Escaped

It would by all accounts look like we'll miss most of Ms. Rita as she canters well east of us, not that I was really thinking we'd see a whole lot to begin with. The gas station was quite busy last night, I did top off the tank. It seemed foolish not too, who knows how high gas will be next week. The only thing I stocked up on was Hurricane fixin's and they turned out nicely if I do say so myself, everyone was pleased by my 1337 drink mixing sK!11z0r. Dustin provided a caserole that would make any good Baptist women pea green with envy. We roleplayed and had a dandy of a good time, no character death, which looking back on it seems astonishing...such was the amount of sheer folly that we pursued. Outside of the Herbalist locking his keys in his car it was a good evening.

But I digress. The grocery store appeared to have a rather "higher than normal" activety rate and the bottled water aisle was looking particularly well gone over. I considered grabbing a case myself, since all the cool kids were doing it and if for no other reason than I may never ever have another excuse to pretend like I'll be in a hurricane. The best I might do is get a tornado, but those rarely give you opprotunity to run to the store for supplies...quite rude storm tornados are. Warren posted a note on his etherpages, evidently the Austinauts are in a full gourging rut of hurricne frenzy and I can't blame them, I know I would be too. Really, who could resist? I particularly enjoyed the snippet about the soccer moms going all deathmatch over batteries...

September 22, 2005

Storms a brewin'

Lovely Rita meter maid
Nothing can come between us
When it gets dark I tow your heart away
Standing by a parking meter
When I caught a glimpse of Rita
Filling in a ticket in her little white book
In a cap she looked much older
And the bag across her shoulder
Made her look a little like a military man

Lovely Rita meter maid

May I inquire discreetly (Lovely Rita

When are you free to take some tea with me? (Lovely Rita, maid, ah)

Rita!

I keep seeing that Lovely Rita will, at the very least, be a Tropical Storm by the time she reaches us here in big D, but she could still be a fiesty Cat 1. I'm excited for some reason, it's crazy to think that four or five hours from the coast we could experience hurricane force winds. The kin we have in the Houston area have refugeed up to Waco with the rest of the family, I haven't heard from the Jailor in Corpus so I'm assuming his ass and the posteriors belonging to his gaggle are speedily moving out of the way. I feel like I should be preparing or something, go buy bottled water and a case of spam, you know, just in case. Oh, and ingredients for making Hurricanes. *grin*

W

Nature may yet achieve what the Democratic party couldn't.
-Warren via BadSignal

As I hit the save button it suddenly occured to me that maybe God is trying to tell us something, but I don't think it's what they think that I think they think it is.

September 21, 2005

Weekend Entertainment

I don't usually like to post things I find on Fark, as I expect you to do your own goddamned leg work, but this is just too funny.

How to make your very own Hamster Fighting Machine

WoWcapades

Hello, my name is Jeff and I'm addicted to this goddamned game. For better or worse it seems. I've tried to break away, but I always crawl back.

I have created characters on four different servers. I have seven characters on Dragonblight that I all play from time to time.

So in the spirit of this admission, I give you Flintlocke; I haven't really delved to deeply into this, but it seems funny.

X1 sent me this link about plauge and I do appreciate that.

My circle of WoWnauts appears to have potential for growth. Both Ruvaldt and Dustin appear ready to take the plunge and I think we can all be excited about bunny having already joined the cabal.

Purblind Distortion

Warren sent this out via bad signal. I don't know why I feel the need to post it here...

bad signal WARREN ELLIS

It's been about a week since I last
spoke to Leticia. She'd just started
a new temp secretarial job, and was
working her little arse off. I think
the last note I got was that she
loved JONES #3, a script I'd talked
to her about way back when.

Her name was Leticia Blake, but she
worked in the adult film industry as
Eva Lux. Mostly fetish stuff --
BDSM, fringe things like electro-play,
a little gonzo. She'd giggle about
the titles: Black Dicks In White Chicks.
She'd hit a bad patch a while back,
but was putting her life back
together. She was about six weeks
away from moving in with a friend,
a stable one, was modelling again,
and was working up to recommencing
her writing.

I woke up this morning to a note from
a mutual friend that Leticia died
yesterday afternoon. I don't really
feel like telling you how.

I'm bothered by the idea that, by
the end of the day, Leticia could
be written off as another adult film
statistic. She subtitled her blog
"Diary of a Pleasure Activist." She
was smart, and she didn't fool
herself about a goddamn thing. She
knew she was the epitome of the
Oscar Wilde line: "I can resist
everything except temptation."
She had the writer's need to write,
but life kept getting in the way.

Our mutual friend is a shaman and
ceremonialist. On Thursday night,
she's lighting candles for Leticia.
Me, I'm having a glass of white wine.
She'd always have a glass of white,
some Californian muck chilled to
within an inch of its life, during our
marathon conversations.

I'm going to miss you, sweetheart.

-- W

September 20, 2005

Behoovial Gestures of Propriety

Ok, two more things. I'm fucking sick and tired of goddamned Talk Like A Pirate Day. I am impressed that this new "holiday" has managed to already burn me out. Over saturation of a concept. Every where I went yesterday it was "YAR" and "AVAST" and fucking eye patches, cutlasses and, sweet mother Mary, peg legs. Now I'm seeing the residual drudge on the ‘net, like that vile refuse you find after a particularly raucous party, where your dazed hung-over mind swirls violently as you ask yourself, "Why God, why?".

Two, when Trinity first told me about this I thought it was funny, but not overly so. After seeing the picture I now understand the cockthristy brilliance of the concept.

Lustful Incantations of the Underdeveloped

I really, really NEED one of these: Electric Sheep Shirt

Psst. My size is XL

The EtherStrands are slow today and the WoW servers are still down for their weekly scrubing and refluffing, but I endeavor to keep up the good fight. Oh, work is slow too. I'm making the wild assumption that our user base is somehow distracted at the moment from finding new ways to fuck up their computers.

And because I know that you want to know, there will be post-apocalyptic role-playing and White Russians tonight. Two things that may not traditionally go together, but should.

Lost Centrifuge of Desire

I've been on a little bit of a nostalgic kick lately. Going back to look at or listen to things that I haven't experienced in a while, but that at one point or another brought some level of amusement. Most notably has been my over infatuation with my "Best of" Parliament CD, which I have been listening to for better part of a week now, over and over.

So this morning, as I staggered into the office with that early morning haze of sleep and fatigue, I made some mumbly sounds in imitation of the Swedish Chef from The Muppet Show. Of course co-worker Jon responded in like and this got me to feel all of a sudden very nostalgic for all things Muppet. I then realized, as I poured coffee and filled the water bottle (have to get anti-oxidized and stay hydrated, yo) that it has been many moons since I've had the pleasure of enjoying some Jim Henson style Muppet entertainment. Jon pointed out that this is more than likely due to Henson's untimely demise via some sort of heart malady(?) and I'm pretty sure he has a good point. I recall being upset upon hearing of his death and hopeful that someone would pickup the torch and carry on, but this does not seem to be the case.

I'm sure I could procure everything ever featuring a goddamned Muppet via DVD these days, what with the sudden proliferation of every show that was ever been remotely popular being inscribed to digital recording media. Doing that though would leave me feeling like I'm feeding some sort of nefarious black hearted marketing scheme designed to squeeze the life blood from the geek crowd. I'm sure I will succumb sooner or later, if not Muppets than something else.

I blame all this CGI shit for the demise of Muppets more so than the death of Henson, and I blame George "Bat-shit Loco" Lucas more than others. Ever since computer processing power got cheap every movie jockey with half a budget has just thrown in some digitally animated creation. I guess puppets aren't cool anymore, but as I say that there is something in the back of my head trying to remind me of a fairly major piece of celluloid that featured puppets, oh well, can't remember. If I were to get down to the "brass tacks" of the situation it would probably be revealed that it is also now much more cost efficient to use CGI instead of puppets, but I don't feel passionate enough about it to do the research…write four paragraphs about it, yes…research it, no.

So anyway, yes, I miss Muppets. I miss Fraggles on HBO and the doozers and the fraggles eating the doozer's construction. The Swedish Chef and those two old guys that sat in the balcony, Monster and definitely Gonzo, all missed. Maybe I should look to see what Netflix has on tap.

September 19, 2005

When the Murloc Bites....ouch!

Fashion is Key - CAD

Lemur-like Sensations of Doom

So that weekend thing happened again as is its want these past 31 years. I somehow managed to enjoy it and experienced that clichéd moment of hating the "Monday", which is an emotion I don't usually give into. The bed was comfortable and the cats were sleeping peacefully at opposite ends of my body, so yes, there was some difficulty in evacuating the bed at 5:20 in order to stumble off to the gym for exercises. I did do it and felt the better for it, some efforts really do pay off.

My Saturday event that was the source of much speculation ended up being exactly what I expected, perhaps not what I had wanted, so much, but what I had feared reality would enforce upon me…as it so often does. The event was nice and the company pleasant, I met new people and looked at old cars. I know little about cars, but all of these were definitely old, "classics" I'm told and I observed that they all did indeed have four tires and steering wheels. Thus it was confirmed to my mind that they were all indeed cars, though there could be some debate as to the "classic" status of some. The 40's era Rolls and Bently were without the doubt very classic, and classy!

The rest of the time was spent intensely playing World of Warcraft. Trin and I found a new guild through a friend of hers and it has made the game more enjoyable, so it continues to have its hook in me. I did spend what is becoming a Sunday ritual with X1 at Café Brazil. I had my customary three pancakes and a bit of coffee, though not as much as I was in polite company. The rest of that day included burrito from Freebirds, something I've not indulged in for quite some time, root beer and snack size rolos. Not a bad way to round out the weekend.

September 16, 2005

Handle Exploding Stoats with Care

I once again find myself getting myself worked up about the possibility of possibilities. I've been informed of an event on the morrow that will be attended by a certain someone, and whom I will be meeting at said event. I know I shouldn't let myself get all atwitter over these things, in all likelihood it really is nothing. But for the moment it is very fun to let anticipation build and the excitement course through the tired, dry veins.

Raving Weasels of Doom

"Don't you watch the news? Kanye West says George Bush doesn't care about black people"
/mirth

September 15, 2005

Healing Factor x2

Cats, in the air.

"I want the bomb. I want the P-Funk. I want my funk uncut.": It not only grooves, it removes. Dig?

September 13, 2005

Healing Factor

Fat Cat in Overalls

September 12, 2005

TypeKey

I've made a few small changes to the blog backend over the past few days. Tonight's update is the ability to sign in via TypeKey when posting a comment. The biggest benefit to this is that once you've made a comment and have been designated a trusted commenter, your feedback will be posted to the blog immediately. That means you don't have to wait for Jeff to approve each and every comment you use. There's no charge to sign up for a TypeKey account, and it'll even save you a few keystrokes when posting comments here. Enjoy!

September 11, 2005

Past Reason

So then we find ourselves at the end of a hard fought weekend wishing we had met every goal that we'd set at its onset. But finding that truth of the matter is something better left to earlier days, those days that we barely understood. Days that we thought better left to healthy living in closed environs so that we wouldn't be mixed up in all those vices we swore off earlier in the week.

Then we find ourselves in manic moods trying to transcribe the last moments of freedom when the "responsibility" of being "professional" are bearing down on us. All of a sudden you don't want to be responsible anymore, you want to be yourself but there isn't enough light left in the wide world to facilitate you're needs, so there you are worrying over the spelling of single goddamned word. And to think you started of the day thinking you were going to Church. These are the ravings of madmen, hopeful evangelist thinking that man is called for something better than the base thoughts your thinking at the end of it all.

So now you've gathered all the things around you that will bring you to the foundation of thought that will lead you on to more haughty platforms. You're feeling a little fatigued but you want to continue on because you think you have something important to say, but all you really have left is the gumption to bellow forth your own needs that are in and of themselves base and worthless. Things you can't hope to accomplish in the few hours of sanity that are left you.

All you're hoping for is some enlightening conversation of friends like minded so you can establish your foundation of sanity, but you've lingered to long in the insanity of popular society and you find yourself struggling to believe all the lies that swirling in the maelstrom of you mind, hoping that the spell checker of your final edit will save you from the fallacies of your final contemplations.

Deep down you know that you're just a slave to the convictions that you've already established. It was there all along, the drugs and misdirection that we wanted to ignore until the last moment and then find ourselves over indulging in. Then there are the vendors that are too happy to take your vices and turn them into profit, never caring that the products their giving are going to make you regret many decisions that you're going to make over the next twenty-four to forty eight hours.

September 09, 2005

What Can I Do?

I'm excited. I came home to a notice on my door announcing that Power Properties will be handing out apartments as temporary housing to Katrina victims...yippie! They want donations of furniture and such to help...well furnish..the apartments and it just so happens that I have furniture that I wish to get rid of. Hopefully they'll take it, the couch is a lil cat worn, ie it became the scratching post when X2 and I threw away the old post and neglected to buy a new one, but otherwise it's in pretty good shape. Still comphy and a joy to pass out on drunk and never thrown up on, that's a plus.

So, yay, self-serving charity! I know it's not much, but it'll be my little part of giving. I still haven't heard from the Salvation Army on the volunteering thing, maybe they're overrun and have a glut of volunteers, or maybe they just don't need someone who's primary skills include MMORPGs.

I'm putting this here so no one has to read it, I know a lot of people are getting tired of talking and hearing about it...I can't seem to let it go.

As it seems to me right now, FEMA and the Federal Gov't's plan for disaster response unraveled as soon as the hurricane came ashore. They were meeting, they were planning, but their battle plan didn't survive contact with the enemy, they should have known this, it is elementary strategy. Then FEMA actually kept aid from arriving in LA. Last week right after the storm had passed and levees broke I was asking why didn't they have convoy's staged and ready to go?...well it seems that several National Guard units and companys under contract for FEMA were ready and rearing to go, only FEMA was in chaos, our leadership was busy visualy inspecting their own rectal canals, and so days go by before the order is given to go.

I will still say that there was no malice, no racial motivations...you don't need these things to explain what happened. SImple ineptitude will suffice.

I've now read Moore's letter and reread Stein's article...I'm putting them both in the bullshit file, one on the right and one on the left.

Note: writing from the hip here, no editing, but this is more for me than ya'll so...carry on.

Results

Checked the tracking thinggy today. I'm averaging 57.8 hits a week or about 8 a day, trust me when I say this is far, FAR more than I ever expected. For some reason Wednesday and Thursday seem to be the big hit days. In the back of my head I imagine this is because you've used up the rest of the week to catch up on everything meaningful and by the arse end of it all your starting to wonder, "What crap do I have left to waste time on?" So that's what I'm here for, that last lonely ramshackle dive at the end of the street of your week...the one where, when your out Friday at the more hip places with your trendy friends you loudly exclaim, "I'm never going back to that piss hole again!"

See you next week.

Can't Stop

I have Snopes on my news reader and there have been a few interesting articles popping up since the whole Katrina thing happened. I don't really know how much to trust Snopes, but I figure at least as much as anything else I read on the Internet, maybe a tad more.

Blame Nagin: So there are some people out there who are obviously willing to fabricate complete falsehoods in order to mislead, no surprise really. The most interesting part of this article for me was the time line down at the bottom.

The White House responded to Governor Blanco's request that same day (Saturday) by declaring the emergency and authorizing FEMA "to identify, mobilize, and provide at its discretion, equipment and resources necessary to alleviate the impacts of the emergency."

Does this mean that the White House did its job and FEMA dropped the ball? I read that Brown has been removed from command of the recovery and I heard on GMA this morning that there are BIG discrepancies on his resume, so that leads me to ask how he got the job. Was he simply appointed or what?

Worst Disaster: This is just funny, IMHO.

Working Very Well for Them: I heard this last night around the PnP RPG table last night and when I saw it on Snopes today I was hoping that it would come up as a False. Mostly because I hate to hear of anyone saying anything so blatantly stupid. I wanedt to give some benifit of the doubt and say that the ol' bint meant something other than what she said and it came out wrong, but any way you slice it I just cringe.

School Buses: I found this one intersting too.

Views

My good friend Dustin, who is a way better writer than me, has put up what I think is a very good article about the current goings ons. There's a linky over in the linky list: ShadowedMind. Here's a more direct etherlink to his bit of the cybewebs...

My own feelings are mirrored a lot in what he's saying. So yeah.

*UPDATE* as per Dustin's request the link in the entry is now to the main page. Click on Weekly to read his article.

September 08, 2005

Another reason...

I should know better than to stick my mouth out where my brain can't handle it. I've spent what little free time I've had today looking at various stories about Katrina in the aftermath. Like everything that's going on in our world today I can't really decide who to believe, it seems like everyone is very busily pushing whatever measure of truth they know towards their own agenda. I say it seems that way, perhaps just to me.

Stories that I read and hear seem to sway violently from one end to the other, depravity and horror to valiant bravery and kindness. FEMA's response was horrendous to FEMA's response was as good as it could have been given the situations. So, really, I don't know what to think right now or who to believe. It seems hardly comprehensible, all the things that have gone on. There are things I would like to believe, things that I want to believe, but deep down I have the feeling that I'm being a little to naive and optomistic.

I'm sure the truth is somewhere in the murky, grey middle. It's my belief that it often does. In the midst of catastrophic destruction and chaos most people will desolve into their baser instincts. Decisions are made and the true character of many people rises to the surface during times of duress, for good or ill. There's been a lot of good and a ton of ill. Perhaps there has been intentional malice, perhaps great evils are at work in the aftermath of an enormous natural disaster. There are stories that I find hard to dismiss out of hand, but also find hard to completely trust. To my mind, like so many other unfortunate situations I've viewed through the toob, you don't need conspiracy or evil Presidents to explain what happened. Quite simply people tried their best, but made mistakes and other's suffered because of it and died because of it. I guess I'm just not ready to believe that there are people out there, in leadership roles or elsewise, with the type of malice to do such evil deeds.

So I'm naive and trusting...it is, after all, who I am.

A Well Deserved Interlude...

Okay...I think we can all agree that we need to lighten thigns up around here...and with that in mind I give you:

BUMM BUMM BUMM BUMM!!

CATS

IN

SINKS!!!

I mean, it's cats! in sinks! EEEEE!!!

found via SEB

September 07, 2005

Yes, yes…the fucking levees

As I hear it those levees have been around for awhile. That would seem to indicate that more than one Federal administration had opportunity to reinforce them or shore them up or whatever. To say that funding the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan are the reason the levees were not able to withstand Katrina is very short sighted.

From National Geographic's website:

Lt. Gen. Carl Strock, chief of engineers for the Corps, dismissed suggestions that recent federal funding decreases or delayed contracts had any impact on levee performance in the face of Katrina's overwhelming force.

Instead he pointed to a danger that many public officials had warned about for years: The system was never designed to withstand a storm of Katrina's strength.

Interesting...very interesting.

This is why...

...I don't write about this stuff. There are others that are so much better at it than I could ever be. This article points out a lot of the absurdities that are driving me crazy as all the groups scuttle around trying to force their own agendas, instead of...oh I don't know...helping?

My 2 Cents Worth, if it adds up to that much...

There are some things I need to download out of my head. These are things I don't normally say out loud, as I feel that I don't particularly have the authority or wisdom to say them. But there does come a point where the cauldron is bubbling way to high and threatens to boil over its mysterious thick green, gloopy mixture.

There has been not an insubstantial amount of hullabaloo about this rapper person, Kayne West, and his antics on a hurricane fund raising tele-program. The general uproar has been about the censorship, you know, because he criticized President Bush. Um, yeah. So evidently NBC and the Bush administration deem Mr. West a character of climatic civil disobedience and obviously warrant his comments as much more dangerous than the rampant galaxy of criticism currently swirling through the maelstrom of our media airwaves. And to put a feather in the cap of governmental inadequacy, our big brother censors are obviously not yet up to snuff as the clip is easily accessible over the cybernets.

This was not censorship, this was good television editing and I'm assuming it was live. There was some concern when I heard about the censorship, but after viewing the segment…I'm sorry…it is simply embarrassing, and it was all I could do to make it through to the end. Mike Meyer's reaction is awesome. West should stick to rapping and if he feels the need to deliver political commentary he should do it on his own show, not during a telethon were so many are trying to help. It wasn't the appropriate time or place.

As equally ridiculous are the Christian Right Wing idiots that are making statements that this was some wrath of God thing. As we are all aware New Orleans is quite the sin destination for all the hip degenerates and perverts, so one could almost see why God would want to smite the city. Though if this is the case of divine wrath then it missed the bourbon soaked French Quarter that is predominantly responsible for all the decadence. So it's nice to see that God's aim isn't always that good either, but don't be too critical. When was the last time you tried to steer a hurricane?

I'm equally enamored with all the African-American leadership worming their way out of the wood to flash the race card. This somewhat ties into the complaints of response time and Mr. West's impromptu tantrum. If you have the gall to make the accusations that the state and federal government would wantonly let people suffer because they are poor and/or black than it is my feeling that you are a person of base and nefarious character. Looking more to undo than to provide solution. Our government may be guilty of many inadequacies in lieu to this particular crisis, but to belittle the thousands of people trying to help by throwing out this despicable ploy is, to me, unconscionable.

Lastly, in regards to response, what did you expect? The majority of infrastructure in three states was destroyed. The response was slow, the aid was slow, evacuation was slow? In comparison to what? This situation is beyond the pale in comparison to anything that has happened in our history. The logistics of this operation were and are monumental and no other country in the world could have responded any better than ours did. A week after the disaster a major US city has been evacuated and the refugees have been put into shelters. Within three days of being called up the National Guard was in route to the area. Could it have been better, should it have been better? Sure, in a perfect world.

So there's my embarrassing impromptu tirade.

September 06, 2005

I don't know

I think I'm starting to dread the weekends. They're turning into this morass of unproductive time and I'm somewhat relieved to be back at work for no other reason than the measure of structure I have during the week. I have my schedule for the week, my gym schedule, my work schedule, my eating schedule…all very structured. For some reason this doesn't really carry over to the weekends. So I end up sitting around, playing games, and drinking. I'm to the point where I'm starting to dread it. Those activities no longer hold any amusement for me and I'm having a hard time conjuring up new things to do.

This weekend was particularly tough. The dark shadow of the hurricane aftermath put a taint on everything I did and I felt pangs of guilt whenever I spent money on myself. As way of fighting my funk I signed up on the Salvation Army's web page to volunteer and I felt better for it. No idea what will come of it, but I'm hoping some good. Perhaps I can help other people and find some level of personal satisfaction as well. So there is a little selfishness in my motives.

Happy Birthday to X2! She had a little shindig at Pete's Piano bar(?) in Addison and it was quite a good time. Two pianos, a lot of good sing-a-long music, booze and friends made for a fun night. It was a tad loud and after about three hours of it, it does get a little old. Oh, and kudos to her for winning the silly contest. As I arrived at the bar and walked in there she was in the middle of the stage amongst a line up of about eight other women all doing this sing-a-long thing with hand gestures. It was akin to the old Irish song "Rattlin' Bog", but with far more crude lyrics.

September 05, 2005

CUNT

Really, a fascinating word, I think it's going to be replacing fuck at all the parties this next spring. Honestly, when one thinks about it, fuck is becoming old hat, hell you're grandmother is probably bandying it about at Sunday School, such as:

Grandma: "Jesus really fucked up those money changers in the temple, yo!" (the yo is optional, use it at your descretion)

Fuck is just becoming way too common and I'm feeling fairly positive that cunt is going to be this season's next fuck. Wow, when you read that sentence aloud it sounds really weird.

So, as a service to you, my filthy readers, I have taken it upon myself to provide a useful link so as you might brush up on your knowledge of the word cunt. After all, you don't want to be throwing this lil' beauty around without some information as to its potency, that wouldn't do at all. Ok, so really all I did was look it up on Wikipedia, but let's be honest, do you really want to google "cunt". I didn't think so.

So here you are: LINKY GOODNESS. I particularly like this part of the article:
"cunt is occasionally used as a jovial term of endearment (e.g. "he's a good cunt"). This usage is limited, however,"
I should bloody think so!

Anyway, enjoy…feel free to increase your admiration of me as you see fit.

September 01, 2005

Falling In Love Again

My dear, dear filthy readers, I have seen Serenity and I have deemed it good, but multiply "good" by, like, a hundred bazillion gazillion. Then you will have some minor fathoming as to how utterly fantaticamazingsuperawesomeorgasmicfilmexperiencecoolness that the movie was. I went in feeling that no matter what I would be able to enjoy the film, much in the same way that I enjoyed the Star Wars prequels while at the same time understanding that they were bludgeoning the beloved Trilogy into an unrecognizable mass of oozy black pulp. Plus I was getting to see it for free and just about a month before it is available to the rest of you dirty, dirty peasants. Really there was NO way I would not have enjoyed this film on at least some very base, primitive level.

I was literally blown away and all my expectations were not only met, but then blown into a bazillion gazillion tiny shards of undulating, passionate love. I laughed, I wept, and I maneuvered my ass in the seat with the subconscious belief that I was helping our heroes escape from their various predicaments, something I have never been made to do. There was gasping. There was shock and relief and by the end I left the theater with such a mixed bag of strong emotions that it felt as if I might pass out. Pass out! I feel I can almost speak for the rest of the audience as I can not tell you that I have ever heard the same level of excited banter as people left their seats. And the applause…there was thunderous applause!

As of right now, this has to be the absolute apex of Joss Whedon's story telling and writing talents. In my opinion it is obvious that he was able to focus all of his mysterious powers on this one project and, wow, does it show. Everything about this movie reeks, like the most divine incense, of concentrated Joss imagination, every aspect being a level or two above his previous work…perhaps Joss got turned up to 11? The dialogue is uber-snappy, the story ranges from extreme to extreme, being light hearted and endearing to being completely hard-nosed and frightening. You find yourself seeing the best and worst of humanity, often from the same characters.

All of our beloved characters are reprised by the original cast of Firefly and they do an excellent job of jumping right back into those roles. It's as if the series ended only yesterday, with the slight caveat that there is a gap between where the series ended and where the movie starts. I've only seen the series on DVD, so I'm sure if you've only seen the series as it was butchered by Fox there may be a bit more a learning curve. Even with the time lapse you quickly find yourself right back in the zone and I believe a lot of this has to do with how well the characters are portrayed.

The pacing is steady, and I never felt like there was a lull, the story is laid out so that those of you who are not familiar with Firefly should be able to become immersed into and understand what's happening fairly quickly. I'm hesitant to say too much, so as not to ruin anything in any way, but I will say that the film closes all the doors that the series never got a chance to close. But with that being said, I see the portal left open for what I assume is Joss' hope that the series will be picked up again by a network. Either way I am very contented if this does prove to be the end.

It comes out in wide release September 30, go see this film!