Unwanted Commentary

I figured it was time for some actual unwanted commentary on timely topics.

First, right up at the top, there's a blurb from the AP about a grandmother who is suing Rockstar, makers of the controversial Grand Theft Auto series. Evidently she's upset that she bought her 14-year-old grandson a copy of San Andreas without realizing it had hidden pornographic scenes in it. Right. If she wins her case I hope the judge forces the old bint to take parenting classes and a remedial reading course. Because if one were to read the box, one would see that the MSRB has labeled the game as appropriate only for those 17 and older. Then if one were to practice proper parenting skills then one would not buy this particular piece of digital entertainment for their fourteen year old grandson. They are impressionable at that age.

Also noted that the shuttle fleet has been grounded until they figure out why bits keep falling off. Personally I think it's all getting blown out of proportion by the media. I'm pretty sure bits have been falling off the shuttle for a long time, but I guess you can expect them to be really sensitive to it now, you know, because of what happened last time. I did find it odd that they felt the need to announce that the fleet is grounded though. I was thinking, "Gee, glad they stopped those bi-weekly shuttle flights before things got out of hand." How long does it take to launch a shuttle? Four, maybe six months, do you really have to ground an aircraft that is only capable of taking off twice a year?

It also says on page 4 that about 300 Scouts at the Boy Scout National Jamboree got sick from the heat waiting for President Bush to arrive. Ummm, isn't Be Prepared, like, your fucking motto? It was when I was a Scout, and we also used to go camping outside…in the heat, you know, where it's hot.

And a real fucking gem of a story. Ikea. This has been driving me nuts. Why has the opening of this store been in the news all week? It's a furniture store, they don't cure cancer or provide hand jobs. But don't be mistaken, I'm not saying curing cancer or dealing in hand jobs should be the only requisite for legitimate news items, as err…handy as that information could be. On top of wondering why Ikea was newsworthy I was really wondering why someone would be camped outside the store and why THAT was newsworthy. I was considering this to be apex, nay the acme, of foolishness, but come to find out that the first person in line gets a $2500 line of credit once the store opens. So now I feel shame for not being "with it". Plus the added humiliation of knowing that I wasted two vacation days last week spending time with my friends when I could have been setting myself up to receive twenty-five big ones for furniture, and those of you who've been to my apartment can attest to the fact this would be a boon. Ah well, as I try to reason out why I keep wasting my life I'll console myself with this tidbit of wisdom from Co-worker Jon's friend's wife, who is from Sweden, who said that in Sweden Ikea is akin to buying your furniture from Wal-Mart. Hah, bitch, have fun with your $2500 of Swedish Wal-Mart furniture.